The Whistler's DaughterChristine “Kippy” Hoene
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Beyond the Book9 min read

My Completely Unscientific Sports Ratings

The fun, fear, cost, difficulty and cool factor of every sport I tried—rated with absolutely no scientific method.

Another thing that didn’t make it into The Whistler’s Daughter was my personal rating of every sport I tried.

Which were the most fun? Which were terrifying? Which required lessons, money, muscles—or all three? And, perhaps most importantly, which made me look the coolest?

These ratings are entirely subjective and scientifically questionable. They reflect my experience, my abilities, and possibly how badly I was bruised afterward.

The rating system

😄 Fun Factor | 👍 Lessons recommended | ⭐ Lessons helpful, but not required | 👎 Lessons unnecessary | 💪 Difficulty—from learning the basics to mastering the sport | 💲 Cost | 😬 Fear Factor | 😎 Cool Factor

The ratings

1997 – Tennis

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: ⭐ Helpful, but not requiredDifficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎

1998 – Fencing

Fun: 😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

1998 – Rollerblading

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬😬Cool: 😎😎

1999 – Outdoor Rock Climbing

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2000 – Wakeboarding

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2000 – Racewalking

Fun: 😄Lessons: ⭐ Helpful, but not requiredDifficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎

2001 – Cross-Country Skiing

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎

2001 – Snowshoeing

Fun: 😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪 → 💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎

2002 – Squash

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎

2003 – Geocaching

Fun: 😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎

2003 – Orienteering

Fun: 😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎

2004 – Spelunking

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2004 – Telemark Skiing

Fun: 😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2005 – Snowboarding

Fun: 😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2005 – Olympic Weightlifting

Fun: 😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎

2006 – Mountain Biking

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2007 – Surfing

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2008 – Yoga

Fun: 😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎

2008 – Slacklining

Fun: 😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎

2009 – Paddleboarding

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎

2010 – Aerial Silks

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2011 – Ice Climbing

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2012 – Trapeze

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2013 – Kitesurfing

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2013 – Tumbling

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎

2014 – Stilt Walking

Fun: 😄😄Lessons: ⭐ Helpful, but not requiredDifficulty: 💪 → 💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎

2014 – AcroYoga

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: ⭐ Helpful, but not requiredDifficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2015 – Pole Vaulting

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2016 – Pickleball

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: ⭐ Helpful, but not requiredDifficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎

2016 – Snow Kiting

Fun: 😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2017 – Tightrope Walking

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎

2017 – Bungee Dance

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2018 – Windsurfing

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2019 – Tap Dancing

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎

2019 – Scuba Diving

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2020 – Wing Surfing

Fun: 😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2021 – Roller Pole

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2021 – Paragliding

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎😎

2022 – German Wheel

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

2023 – Parallel Bars

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: ⭐ Helpful, but not requiredDifficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎

Belly Dancing

Fun: 😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎😎😎

Roller Skiing

Fun: 😄Lessons: 👎Difficulty: 💪 → 💪💪💪Cost: 💲Fear: 😬Cool: 😎

Lollipop Lyra

Fun: 😄😄😄😄😄Lessons: 👍Difficulty: 💪💪 → 💪💪💪💪💪Cost: 💲💲Fear: 😬😬Cool: 😎😎😎😎

The completely unscientific winners

Most fun: Outdoor rock climbing, mountain biking, surfing, aerial silks, trapeze, kitesurfing, windsurfing, roller pole and Lollipop Lyra.

Coolest: Outdoor rock climbing, mountain biking, surfing, aerial silks, ice climbing, trapeze, kitesurfing, snow kiting, windsurfing, scuba diving, roller pole and paragliding.

Most terrifying: Paragliding—without question.

Most expensive: Wakeboarding and kitesurfing.

Best combination of inexpensive, easy and fun: Pickleball.

Least likely to become my lifelong passion: Racewalking, snowboarding, Olympic weightlifting and roller skiing. Sorry—not every sport can be the one.

Looking back, the ratings tell a story of their own. The sports I loved most were rarely the easiest or safest. They were the ones that challenged me, frightened me a little and gave me the satisfaction of doing something I wasn’t sure I could do.

That is really what The Whistler’s Daughter is about: not becoming the best at every sport, but refusing to let a prognosis decide which ones I was allowed to try.

Which sport would you try—and which one would you refuse to attempt even if I paid you?

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